I found this while performing a routine diagnosis of B-Mo’s memory banks. It looks like he’s writing a screenplay of our adventures…
FADE IN:
EXT. JUNGLES OF CHOLGANNA – DAWN – ESTABLISHING
A valley cuts through the vast expanse of jungle canopy. The rising sun reflects off a large lake. Partially submerged is the remains of the Sa Nalaor, it hull obviously stripped of parts making it difficult to tell the extent of damage it sustained during the crash. The Noculent (YT-2400 series ship) sits in a clearing, close to the banks of the lake.
INT. THE NOCULENT – COCKPIT
A neatly groomed human, LAN GREYSON, sits in the pilot’s seat checking system sensors and scanner readings. Noticing a scuff on one of the screens, he quickly polishes it with the cuff of his shirt.
INT. THE NOCULENT – GAND’S QUARTERS
A jar of swirling gases sits on a shelf next to the bed. A slightly disheveled gand, GAND, peers intently into the jar, seemingly oblivious to all else around him.
INT. THE NOCULENT – LOUNGE
Weapons are sprawled out on the table in various stages of assembly. A shoddily armored human, VERK MESQEN, cleans and reassembles his small armory. Off to the side a black R2 droid, R2-Q5, takes inventory of an oddly large supply of water. A display reveals his true activity when it displays an outline of his plans to destroy someone named Sum Randeux and start a robot mafia.
INT. THE NOCULENT – TRAN’S QUARTERS
The room is in disarray. A small package can be seen protruding from under the bed, the letters “NIP” are visible on one side. A sleeping bothan, TRAN TEREEZ’SKRA, stirs as an alarm clock starts to ring. Tran sits up and fires his blaster at the alarm clock and falls back into slumber. The alarm clock clatters to the floor onto a pile of similarly destroyed alarm clocks.
INT. THE NOCULENT – MAIN ENGINEERING
Droid parts litter the floor. A tall, dark, and stunningly handsome human, JURIS VARGA, stands over a half assembled droid, tools in hand. Leaning against the doorway is a top-of-the-line battle droid, B-MO.
Juris pulls his hand back in quickly as sparks fly from the half assembled droid.
JURIS
Those nexu sure did a number on this old droid.
B-MO
Yeah, but we did quite a number on those nexu. (pause) I still don’t know why you decided to fix that old thing anyway.
JURIS
I felt bad for it. And I didn’t want to get rusty. It’s not like I can make you any better.
B-MO
You’ve got that right. You really perfected the craft when you made me.
The sound of a ship approaching interrupts the conversation. A console on the wall lights up and Lan’s voice is heard on the intercom.
LAN
(through the intercom) Hey Juris, another ship just showed up on the scanners.
JURIS
Yeah, we heard it approach. Do you have a visual?
LAN
(through the intercom) Looks like it’s landing nearby. How do you want to proceed?
JURIS
Let’s see what they want. Gand, take Verk and Tran and see if we can’t accommodate our new guests.
B-MO
Are you sure that’s a good idea. Those three aren’t really the diplomatic type.
JURIS
They’ll be fine. We can’t do everything on this ship. And if something goes wrong, we can go save the day.
B-MO
Like we always do.
JURIS
Like we always do.
EXT. THE NOCULENT – BOARDING RAMP – MINUTES LATER
Gand, Verk, and Tran walk down the boarding ramp, weapons holstered but at the ready. From across the clearing, 3 rodians and 2 trandoshans make their way to the Noculent. The lead rodian, YAV YIYAR, has scars slashed across his face. They stop about half-way between the two ships and take up position behind the few rocks and trees in the clearing.
YAV
Give us the IT droid and we’ll let you leave unharmed. We have you out gunned and outnumbered.
GAND
This Gand does not agree with that rodian’s claims.
VERK
Why should we listen to a bunch of ugly rodians anyway?
TRAN
Perhaps you’d better just get back on your ship and leave.
YAV
You are all fools. (to his companions) Kill them.
Blaster fire erupts from both sides. Tran and Verk dive for cover. Gand retreats to the top of the ramp and gets into a sniping position. Yav returns to his ship.
INT. THE NOCULENT – MAIN ENGINEERING
Juris and B-Mo are watching the fire fight on a monitor.
B-MO
Well, that escalated quickly. I knew we should have handled it.
JURIS
They did better than usual. At least they let them talk before just shooting them this time.
LAN
(through the intercom) Juris! They’re powering up their ship’s weapons!
GAND
(through the intercom) Those trandoshans have flanked that bothan and that human. That
human has taken a hit.
JURIS
Lan, get on the turret and return fire. Gand, hold on, we’re on our way.
B-MO
R2, hack their ship. See if you can’t do something about their shields.
R2-Q5
(through the intercom) Beep boop
EXT. THE NOCULENT – BOARDING RAMP
B-Mo and Juris come running down the ramp, firing their blasters at the enemy. They regroup with Verk and Tran under the ramp. Verk is wounded. Turret fire strikes the shielding of the Noculent causing blue waves of energy to ripple and the return fire does the same to the enemy ship.
JURIS
How are you holding up Verk?
VERK
I’ve had worse. (cringes)
JURIS
Don’t worry, we’ll get us out of this
B-MO
Juris, R2 just informed me that he almost has the shields down.
JURIS
Excellent. Gand, I noticed some faulty conduits on the other ship leading to their turret. Do you see what I’m talking about?
GAND
This gand sees it.
JURIS
On my mark, take the shot. B-Mo and I will handle the rest.
GAND
This gand will comply.
JURIS
You ready for this B-Mo?
B-MO
Always. Let’s do this.
B-Mo and Juris nod at each other and fist bump. A “beep boop” is heard over the coms and the shields over the enemy ship shimmer and go down.
JURIS
NOW!
B-Mo and Juris jump out from opposite sides of the boarding ramp. Gand fires his sniper rifle, hitting the conduit, causing the enemy turret to power down. Juris and B-Mo stand back to back and systematically take out each of the enemies on the battlefield. Yav and his remaining crew power up the ship and fly away. Everyone but Lan, who returns to the cockpit gathers at the boarding ramp.
TRAN
You two are amazing!
VERK
I don’t know what we would do if you two weren’t with us.
LAN
(through the intercom) Hey, guys we’ve got more company. Looks like some humanoids riding giant lizard things.
B-MO
No rest for the weary.
JURIS
Why don’t you knuckleheads let us talk this time. We can’t solve everything with violence.
R2-Q5
Beep boop
Everyone laughs at R2’s smart ass remark.
-Juris Varga